* knowing when you’re wrong
There’s this feeling you get when you’re out of line, and you know it, but you can’t stop. You try to hold the words back, but they start to gather behind your lower lip, building up until your chest feels cold and you need to let it out so you can breathe. When you start to spill, the words come out like crushed ice in one of those stupid dispensers all the “expensive” refridgerators come with now. Nothing sounds right, no matter how hard you try to make it, and finally, you get so frustrated that you can’t explain yourself without being awful, without throwing obscenities around, and without hurting the person you’re talking to, whether you want to or not.
Last night, I experienced that hardcore for the first time in a long time. I try not to blow up at people, but I let my own biases get in the way. I forgot to remember that the person I was talking to was my friend. It was someone I cared about, and someone who had shown nothing but support for me. I learned how stupid I could be, going off at her for doing the same thing I promote constantly. She cared about her friend. Me? I was offended by something stupid. I crossed the border between rightfully upset and plain out ridiculous. I hit that point where sorry just wasn’t what the friend wanted to hear, and where I wasn’t sure if I was sorry for what I said or if I was sorry that it hurt her.
We’re not always going to agree with our friends on everything. We’re not always going to believe the same things, or find the same things morally reprehensible or absolutely hilarious. We’re not always going to see eye-to-eye. A good friend knows when to stop and accept that their opinion isn’t necessarily right, and that whether they believe it or not, they should back off of the person they disagree with. Last night, I did not act like a good friend.
The moral of the story is that you can’t force your opinion on someone else. You can’t say, Look, I’m right. You’re wrong. Believe me, or go screw yourself. That sort of attitude is way out of line and way stupid. At the same time, you can’t change your opinion constantly because someone feels differently than you do about a situation. Be an advocate for what you feel is right, but don’t be a jerk about it, you know?
I hope anybody who reads this will think about it the next time they’ve got… creative differences or whatever with somebody.
… haha, i managed to sound so cliche there, but yeah. i love you guys.
